Pinoy Jokes and Funny SMS Text Messages 38

Pedro: Niloko ko yung tindera kanina.. hahahaha
Juan: paano mo nmn niloko yung tindera??
Pedro: nagpaload ako eh wala naman akong cellphone!!!

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Teacher: Why are you late??
Jr: mam, ther was a man who lost his P500 bill
Teacher: good!!! you helped him look for it right??
Jr:No Mam!!! tinapakan ko po kasi hanggang sa umalis siya!!!

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Man told lady after he raped her...
'in nine months you will have a child, call him Hercules!!!'

The lady replied,
'in nine days youll have rashes on your penis, call it herpes!!!'

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Mga tanong na kailangan ng malalim na pag-iisip

1. Ang lamok ba pag natutulog nilalamok din??
2. Puwede bang uminum ng coke kapag coffee break???
3. ang uod ba pag namatay inuuod din???
4. bakit ang blackboard kulay green??
5. ang lason ba pag naexpired nakakalason pa din??
6. nanganganak ba ang mga bakla?? kung hindi.. bakit sila dumadami??
7. pwede bang magdinner ang may dalang lunchbox???
8. pag sinabi bang 6 feet anim ang paa mo??

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Kapag bored ka na at walang magawa
magbukas ka ng ziper
ilagay mo ang kamay sa loob at ilabas mo

ang libro galing sa bag mo at magbasa ka!!!

kala mo ha!!!

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Kapag nakita mo ako na marumi...
warat warat ang damit....
walang tsinelas at nasa gitna ng kalye...

please wag kang lalapit....

May shooting ako.. bawal ang fans!!!

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Wag kang mahihiya kung lumuluha ang mga mata mo!!!

at lalo namang wag mong pipigilan ang luha mo

dahil baka lumabas yan sa ilong!!!

Yucky yun di ba??

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Dad:(Holding 2 toys letting his son choose) si barbie or superman??
Son: superman dad!!!
Dad: good!!(he then left)
Son:Guwapo mo superman!!! nakaumbok pa!! uuuuhhhhmmm!!!

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a guy was setting up his new email account while his girlfriend sat beside him
feeling all macho, he put in "penis" as his password.
his girlfriend fell off her chair laughing when the error message registered as:
"Password not long enough"

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Makabagong kasabihan:

"aanhim mo ang taong maganda"

"kung siya'y pumapangit pag katabi ko na!!!"

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Bunso: Inay, tingnan nyo po drawing ko oh
Inay: wow!! ang galing namang magdrawing ng monkey ng bunso ko
Bunso: Inay, kayo po yan!!!

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ma, si ate niyakap ng nobyo niya!!!
ok lang naman yan!!

ki-niss ma!!!
ok lang naman yan!!

dinukot dede niya!!!
ok lang rin yan!!!

naku fininger!!!
punyeta!!! may titi ba't hindi gamitin!!!

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Pinoy SMS Text Jokes from 0915801****, 0927660****, 0927325****, 0917856****,0915298****,0915673****