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Sunday, February 14, 2010

Pinoy Jokes and Funny SMS Text Messages 64

Isang gabi habang nanonood ako
tumabi sakin ang lola ko..

ang haba ng buhok itim na itim ng
damit parang malungkot at may
hawak na kutsilyo

kinabahan ako..

nagsalita siya..

sabi niya..

"apo, bagay ba sa akin ang EMO?"
====

Advice from dentist:

Treat your BF/GF like a toothbrush

Dont let anybody use it..

And change it every month...


====

Bakit ganun.. sa kama na lang ba lagi ang role
ko sa buhay mo.. each time na pagod ka im always
here para painitin ang malalamig mong gabi..

Hindi ba ako pedeng idisplay sa mga tao? kahit
minsan lang?


- Kumot(nagdradrama gustong maging Kurtina)

====

Lolo:Laro tayo.
Lola:ano?
Lolo:Kahit ano wag lang taguan
Lola:bakit naman?
Lola: because a girl like you is impossible to find

lupit ni lolo

====

Anak: nay galing ng titser ko.
Nay: bakit namn?
Anak: tinuruan kami ng kagandahang asal
Lola: e d marunong ka ng gumalang at mag-PO at OPO?
Anak:Natural! tanga ka Ba? hmmp...

====

An ambitious NURSE INTERN in a tertiary hospital
dialled canteen
and shouted: " get me a cup of coffee quickly!!!"

The voice from the other line said" "You fool!!!
youve dialled
the wrong extension! Do you know who you are talking to?
im the Chief nurse of this hospital, you idiot!!"

The intern shouted back " and you know who
are talking to you bitch?"

Chief Nurse: No!

Intern: Thank God!(hung up)

====

Bulag at duling magsusuntukan!!
Bulag: hayop ka duling!! lumabas ka dyan.. wag kang
magtago sa dilim!!
Duling: in your dreams!!! bakit ako lalabas eh
dalawa kayo!!!

====

Teacher: Lahat ng tanga dito sa klase tumayo

may isang batang tumayo

Teacher: bakit tanga ka ba?

bata: eh sir.. naaawa lang po ako sa inyo kasi
mayisa lang kayong nakatayo kaya sasamahan ko na lang
kayo para dalawa tayong tanga..

====

Titser: use "anyhow" en "anyone" in a sentence..

Pacman: hoy Pidro!! baki mo kinain ang "anyhow" na manok
na "anyone" ko dyan sa mesa para kay Jengkeh

====

Maid: mam si junjun nakalulon ng ipis!
Mam: ha nsaan si junjun
Maid: tulog po mam. pinainum ko agad ng Baygon!!
patay na siguro yung ipis

====
i mishu







- ngongong nakakita ng piso habang naglalakad sa kalye

====



Pinoy jokes from 0927696****, 0906217****, 0905713****

9 comments:

emmanuel said...

regarge lang ko kang emmanuel alzate

emmanuel said...

guapoha ni emmanuel oi!!!!!!!

fŗέĭ-ċђάŋ said...

naissu~

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Gutzy Gurl said...

hahahaha....
kakatawa ng jokes
pero d lahat!
gud bless u all!

jonalyn said...

hirap umibig

hirap din umiyak

hirap mag mahal

hirap din masaktan

hirap umasa

hiap din mabigo

pero mas mahirap pala sa lhat

ang mag txt ng walang "REPLY"

rhyzrockerz said...

Ung bago naman po..!!!
dati na yan eh..

Aden Ford said...

I really like your blog! Can you help me out with one, if I want to have sex with my neighbor is that bad? I don’t want a emotional relationship, just a physical one.

I posted my problem at http://www.askaden.com

http://www.askaden.com/2010/03/i-want-to-have-sex-with-my-neighbor.html

Mark said...

:-) Guys i hope you will keep this up :-D Marami kayong mga napapatawang tao, at isa na ako dun, hahahah!